I just got back my HTMA (hair tissue mineral analysis) and I’m shocked. I am not shocked by the results. Some of them I already knew due to years long research and my own attempts to try and help myself. I knew that I was in an exhaustion stage of stress, I knew that I was so mineral deficient that I would be categorized as the 4 lows pattern. I knew that I was no longer metabolizing and had gone into catabolism at some point. I knew I had exhausted my fight or flight and was stuck in my parasympathetic system. I knew I had undergone severe traumas as my life experience.
What shocked me, what shook me to my core, what had me triggered and crying last night as I worked it all out while tapping with Brad, was the fact that an unknown doctor, someone who has never seen my face, heard my voice, or had any knowledge of me outside of the fact that my name is Leslie Burnett, I am 42 years old, and he was holding a small piece of a brown hair sample!!!!! knew me. By only looking at my hair, he knew me.
And yet he knew me. He saw all of these things in a few strands of my hair. Yet he saw more. He knew my oxidation rate as a mixed oxidizer. He knew I had severe inversion that was trauma related. He knew that my thyroid is actually a little overactive while my adrenals had resulted in complete burnout.
But this is what got me, and I was totally shook. He KNEW that I have a spiritual defensive pattern. How could he know the depths of my spiritual trauma when no one who knows me can even comprehend how devastating the effects have been???
Then Micah teased me about comments my niece has made about my weight, that I need to just “eat less and exercise more”. And that was what shook the fuck out of me. I’m certain that I needed that trigger so I could do such a great tapping session with Brad so I could see the Glory of God in all things. My mind, soul, and spirit reels that my parents do not know me even on a surface level. That my sisters invalidate my experiences and are not my friends. That my siblings, nieces, nephews – that I am almost completely not even a member of that family, though somehow flesh and blood. In an email from my Dad after Mother’s Day, sent to shame me for my not contacting my Mom this year, my Dad told me that all of my negativity was not “good for my health”. In all actuality I’m beyond grateful for the intense hatred that I experienced towards my parents so that I could be shocked enough to see things how they truly are. Emotions are neither good nor bad, they are an integral part of our humanity and can be life saving if acted on appropriately. Actually, my weight gain is a desperate attempt by my body to hang on to life and keep on going, to keep me at least walking in the tunnel of death (what this doctor calls the 4 lows pattern of mineral deficiency and toxicity) and not fully just die, likely of cancer. I had no idea but living in the parasympathetic means you just constantly pee your magnesium out. So …. supplements have been good, but there are deeper roots to address.
I’m so thankful to Elizabeth Murphy who posted a quote from Dr. Paul Eck on my crunchy and pharma free group. I’m on a nutritional balancing program now. I’ve been healing these last several years, now I can speed up the process.
But the whole hair sample knowing of me has me back in a place where I was at several years ago. I was spiritual discerning some trauma inducing things when I had a vision (in the middle of the day, wide awake, walking in my yard after a workout session) of Jesus Christ hanging on the cross and I was there. Time had lost its meaning and I was a personal part of my saviors experience as he hung on the cross 2,000 years ago. He knew me. I looked, a deep penetrating looked, into the eyes of Christ and I saw myself reflected back at me.
I am known. I am known. And once again in 2020 I am known. I must continue deep on my journey and know myself.
Breathings 